We made our way back towards the Midwest and loved just about every minute of it. (Yes, there is some sarcasm in the last portion of that statement.) As soon as we arrived home, it only seemed like minutes before we had to jump back into our chaotic life! Ella had missed two days of school due to our extended vacation. I started back into classes a week earlier than usual. Douglas went straight into work on his new schedule. Lucius started daycare for the very first time. So we really haven't had to time to let things really sink in. For example, sitting back and telling friends about our adventures or all the new programs we've seen or old programs we've finally experienced while relaxing for hours on end in front of the plasma television with satellite cable. We could not reflect on our holidays, we couldn't even have our annual sit down to list the many reasons for not making a New Year's resolution. There was just NO TIME!!
I have realized that I have been having this warm, fuzzy feeling. No, I am not pregnant. I've checked. It may be that I am coming out of my annual hermit stage that occurs every winter break. At the beginning of every winter break, since I've been in school, I hole up in the house with the family, keeping the curtains closed, not answering the door, not taking any calls and just kickin' back. During this time, we only leave the house for Christmas dinner with extended family and Ella's birthday party.
But now that I have to be out of my house daily, I do enjoy my neighbors, at times. I do like having a regular schedule and dropping the kids off at there destination so I can accomplish my tasks and duties. I especially love getting breaks during the day when I can visit Douglas at his work, kid-free, and hang out without worries. We will be able to do lunch breaks together again, get coffee and converse, or I can go be by myself and BREATHE!
I do have to admit something though. I'm old. And by this I mean that I actually enjoy family life. I resisted. I resisted for years by trying to keep up a social life with my single, kidless friends. It's just not me anymore and I am finally ok with that.
But will I have an occasional burst of wanting my old life again? My old life where I could just walk out of the house at an instant because I wanted to go play pinball and see who was hanging out at the Replay Lounge on a Thursday afternoon. Or when I just wanted to leave for the evening and wonder the streets to barhop downtown. Well maybe not specifically that old life, I was that way in my late teens and early twenties. But something of the sort, a bit more mild and less vagabond. I will actually have a purpose when I want to wonder the streets. Hmmm, maybe. We'll see what happens when the weather warms up again. That is when I get the itch.
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